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State Of The Love Address - 2005 Edition

Love is one of those things. As children, we hear rumors about it. We're told we deserve it, either from our caring parents and guardians or from books, films, that Cinderella story. From seeing others in love, we learn about what the concept is, and why it's so coveted. We hear love songs and find out what it is that is expected of a lover, or what a broken heart is all about.

When we hit puberty, love gets all tangled up with lust. Our hormones are telling us we need to do it: find a mate, and have at it. Kissing turns to more, and those "BIG" feelings begin.

And then things get complicated.

It would be easier to handle all of this if we could just stay in Junior High and deal with love at that level. But, then again, that is just one form of love. Crushes, etc. That's not the real story.

But what is real love?

Love supposedly means "you matter." You matter to someone else. Well, you DO! Certainly if nothing else, you should matter to yourself! And really, that's where love truly begins. Because if you aren't giving yourself love, it's a hard sell to convince someone else to do it.

As I look back on Last Year's Valentine Address, I can see my whole attitude on the subject has changed drastically. You don't have to "earn" love, or "win" it. If you are yourself, and you care about you, and you remain open to it, you should be able to find love.

Then again, we all could be a little bit sweeter. I know I could. It's a matter of being you, but a bit more you that people like! The qualities in yourself that people compliment... playing those up, and dropping the excess baggage. Not always easy to do, but probably worthwhile.

Enjoying your life when you can. That counts for a lot. Throw the energy to the good, and that's where it'll go, hopefully to get more!

And, if you still haven't found someone wonderful, it wouldn't hurt to try "The List," either!

"The List," in case you hadn't heard about it before, is a very detailed point by point set of comments that explains exactly what you're looking for in a mate. The more detailed, the better, because anything you don't list is up for grabs, and the universe frequently has a sense of humor about such stuff, so watch out! This must be written down. Just thinking of what these qualities are won't do. The more detailed, tangible and precise, the better.

Typically, between two and four weeks after you complete your list, a person appears that fits or exceeds all of the elements you listed. Not a joke!

If you are unattached and you had no fun this Valentine's, AND you want to have a partner, I strongly encourage you try it.

Good luck, good love, and we'll see what this year brings!


( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 14th, 2005 11:40 pm (UTC)
Happy Annual Chocolate Day, Dean! BTW, do you think "The List" would work for other things one might want to happen in one's life?
Feb. 14th, 2005 11:59 pm (UTC)
Merci, Cherie!

do you think "The List" would work for other things one might want to happen in one's life?

Hmmm . . . I don't really know. I suppose it could. Yes, I'm sure it could. I'm pretty sure it could. But it might have some messy results.

Feb. 14th, 2005 11:42 pm (UTC)
i did the list about three weeks ago. we'll see.

happy valentine's day, love!
Feb. 15th, 2005 12:00 am (UTC)
I hope you didn't leave anything out!

Happy VD right back, Ms. Heather!
Feb. 15th, 2005 12:39 am (UTC)
Happy "VD"...hehe, that makes me think of something other than hearts and chocolate. Or, see my most recent post. :P
Feb. 15th, 2005 01:10 am (UTC)
Well, those of us w/o someone to share the night with must take our pleasures where we can! ;o)
Feb. 15th, 2005 01:38 am (UTC)
So very true. :)
Feb. 15th, 2005 03:38 pm (UTC)
Dean, this is a great entry! You're so right. Love yourself better, love others better and throw the energy to the good. I'm digging it.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )

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